<body> Solitary
Behind It All

She never told her love,
But let concealment, like a worm i'th' bud,
Feed on her damask cheek. She pined in thought,
And with a green and yellow melancholy
She sat like Patience on a monument,
Smiling at grief. Was not this love indeed?
(Shakespeare, Twelfth Night, 2.4.115-120)

Admirations

... that One God
... that person whom I've known for over a year but noticed only now
... that band that I hail and the one that makes me go dub-dub-dub
... that Canon EOS K2 Rebel
... those friends from back in the days
... those bitters
... those dreams
... those chinitotoys turned pinototoys
... those puppies owned by other people
... those pictures I've taken

Other Beauties

Anna Marie
Angel
April
Kor
Chona
Diana
Joane
Ian
Patricia Lauren
Maria Monica
Ruth Creole
Ruth Crayola
Nadine

...EXIBITIONS

  • June 2005
  • September 2005
  • October 2005
  • November 2005
  • January 2006
  • February 2006
  • March 2006
  • April 2006
  • July 2006
  • August 2006
  • September 2006
  • October 2006
  • November 2006
  • December 2006
  • February 2007
  • March 2007
  • May 2007
  • October 2007
  • February 2008

    •

    Converse



     

    ...Lost in beauty

    layout design, coding,  photo-editing,

    by ice angel



         Brushes- 1| 2

    Saturday, July 22, 2006


    Just a while ago, the rain again made me think of everything that had occurred to me over the last four weeks. I began to feel annoyed, confused and melancholic.

    Annoyed.
    I should not be someone’s possession for nobody owns me – yet.

    Someone has been annoying me through his daily messages and has also been the reason for a lost opportunity for my possible long term bliss. I sound selfish, I admit, for I do not acknowledge your concern for my own happiness. You told me something I had dreaded to hear. To my dismay, I lost my latest infatuation because of it. You told me how rotten my favorite Chocolate was; I became furious and instantly despised you. You told me that Soccer has been pleasing another audience. I felt hopeless right away. I reacted in such a way that it would hide my fresh wound. I used a bandage to cover it up, but I know you were still aware of it. Or I am I mistaken? Now Soccer is releasing its hold on me. It became distant. And it’s this Someone’s fault. Hatred augments.

    Confused.
    Long before my system completely disliked and no longer accepted my Chocolate, I became familiar with Soccer. It was an unexpected acquaintance and beginning of a current emotion. I tried hard to be over my cravings for my Chocolate while enjoying the delight Soccer had been giving me. Then a goal has been achieved. I have somewhat forgotten my Chocolate. But unexpectedly, just like it started, it also ended the same way. I was left clinging to the bliss that soccer has brought me to. It all came to an end. I did not know what happened or what went wrong. Still, I am there until today. I never asked questions, I never researched. I just let the waves crash through me. I am drowning, without something to save me. Soccer isn’t there. Soccer has been pleasing another audience.

    I am mystified. Soccer’s gift of attention and its sudden loss has been and remains a mystery to me until today.

    Melancholic.
    I feel miserable over the past few days. I have been longing for Soccer’s blissful consideration of giving me a renewed attitude. But I realized, I am already longing for nothing at all. Things are no longer the same as yesterday. There are no more late – night Soccer exposures through text. I can no longer read anything from it. He is fading away, though he still is there.

    It really pains me for Soccer might have been the last piece to complete my puzzle. It might have been the one that I have been looking for and not my Chocolate.

    How I wish this would hit the ones concerned, especially Soccer. Bang on the head. Head bat. Whatever.

    Then again...